"I'm Ready for My Close-Up!"

I decided to get Rachel's picture taken professionally while she is still a "newborn." I found a good deal at a studio called Portrait Innovations, which is a place my sister loves to have my nephews' pictures taken. She has tried other places, but never really likes the poses they get. So even though this studio is a bit pricier, she said it is well worth the money in the end.

So on Friday, Rachel and I ventured out to Graceland. I was quite worried that she would end up crying through the entire photo shoot, so I worked hard to make sure she was well-fed and sleeping on the way there. When we arrived, the woman at the desk made a great point of telling me I was 10 minutes late. I thought to myself, "Obviously you have never had a newborn." I scooped Rachel up out of her carseat and she didn't blink -- she was still snoozing.

I can't tell you how proud I was when my little girl slept through the first half of the photo shoot and then, when she did wake up, she was a little angel for the second half! We ended up getting so many awesome pictures that I spent waaaaaaaaay too much money because I couldn't decide on just one or two poses! It also didn't help that Rachel decided it was time to eat just as I was choosing which poses to order, so I began to blindly agree to whatever the guy was trying to sell me just so I could speed things along and get her fed! (Note: Take another adult with you if you go, because they can help care for baby/child while you pick the poses you want.) Now I have about 300 pictures to give away!

The best part was that I got a CD of all her poses, so even though I didn't get some of the funnier faces as prints, I have them forever to share with people. And where better to share them than my blog? The last one here is very similar to a picture of me when I was an infant, so I was really happy to have that one!!

On another note, Rachel has gotten 10 times better with her sleeping habits. Although she has grown accustomed to sleeping in bed with mommy, which we need to break her of. But she pretty much sleeps in 3- to 4-hour stints now, and occasionally she will go for 5 hours. We are taking walks a little more regularly now, when the weather permits it, and we are getting ready for vacation in a couple of weeks. My family is going to upper MI, and Duane can't wait for vacation! It will be interesting, with a 4-year-old, a 2-year-old, and an infant! But as excited as Duane is to go on vacation, it will mean the end of my leave, and I am not excited about that!!

Little Stinker!

Yesterday was Rachel's one-month birthday. I know it seems silly to count in both weeks and months, but when you think about how fast the time is passing, you tend to commemorate every kind of anniversary and milestone.

Speaking of milestones, Rachel decided to celebrate her one-month birthday in two ways. First, when I went to give her a bath, I noticed that the water was just a little bit warmer than I wanted it to be. So, I added some cold water. While we were waiting for the water to mix, I guess the sound of the water moved something in Rachel, because I suddenly felt a very warm sensation down my front. That's right, Rachel peed on her mommy for the first time! Now, she has attempted it in the past, but usually that is when I am changing her diaper, and she just doesn't have the right tools to shoot straight up in the air at me. But she had me right where she wanted me last night -- I was foolish enough to take her diaper off before I was ready to put her in the tub, and I had her in the room when the water was running. Score one for Rachel! But don't think I will hesitate to tell her boyfriends this story when she gets older!

The second milestone was much more exciting for me than for her, I think. Rachel slept from 11:30 p.m. last night until almost 5:30 a.m. this morning! It may have something to do with the fact that we had to give her some soy formula last night because I was having some issues that prevented me from nursing her. And we are not going to give her formula just to get her to sleep through the night, because it really is difficult on her digestive system to go back and forth like that. But that was the best night's sleep I have had in quite a while -- it was almost like Rachel was giving ME a birthday gift!

Time is going so fast. My leave is more than halfway over, and I want time to sloooooooow down. I am not ready to go back to work, as much as I miss the people there. I wish I could find a part-time job that pays full-time pay. That way I could still be with my baby girl as much as possible but get out just enough to feel human! Hopefully by the time we have a second child, Duane will have graduated college and maybe we will be able to afford for me to stay home. Then I can always find a part-time job somewhere to keep me busy.

Here is a video of Rachel. It is short, but it catches her new skill of smiling and laughing!

One Month Already!!

It is hard for me to believe that 4 weeks ago, I was sitting around, planning to be induced to give birth to my daughter, not knowing that my water would break within hours and I would be off to the hospital! It is hard for me to believe that I am not pregnant anymore, and yet it is hard for me to believe there was ever a time that I didn't have this little girl in my life.

In many ways, Rachel and I are still getting to know each other. I know, for the most part, which cries mean what. I know her fake cry (the one that is just a cry for attention) from her really upset cry. I know the stages of her sleep, so I can look over and determine whether she is about to wake up by the look on her face.

However, there is still a lot I don't know about her. I don't know what is bothering her when there is nothing else seemingly the matter with her. I don't know what makes her smile that adorable smile at me and Duane, and I wish I did because it makes my entire day to see that toothless grin. I don't know exactly how to get her to sleep when she is overtired and won't eat properly.

We are still learning so much about each other, but I can tell you one thing -- she loves me unconditionally, and the feeling is definitely mutual!

Here are some amazing stats for Rachel's first month:

** She weighs over 9 lbs now, which is incredible!! She is already filling out her 0-3 month clothes pretty well.

** She is learning to nurse much more efficiently already. She has gone from 40-minute feedings to 15- to 20-minute feeding or less. This makes Mom VERY happy!

** She can hold her head up with the ability of a 2-month-old baby. The nurse who did her last assessment was amazed by her strength and muscle control. She turns her head from side to side with amazing ability and can already lift her shoulders off the ground when she is on her stomach.

** She is one gassy kid! She gives her dad a run for his money!

** And now for the unfortunate news: We believe Rachel has acid reflux. It runs in Duane's family, and he suffers from it. She occasionally seems as though she is in pain when she is nursing or after. She arches her back and cries and is generally fussy. She also gets the hiccups frequently and won't lay on her back. Apparently babies with extreme reflux like to be at an incline when they are lying down. So, I took her to the pediatrician and he prescribed some liquid zantac, which we are hoping will help her.

Sidenote: We found out yesterday that Rachel is going to have another boy cousin. Aunt Jen and Uncle Phil are expecting a baby boy in December!! Congratulations to them and to "Uncle" Donovan and "Aunt" Lindsey, who welcomed their son Brayden to the family on July 16th!

Sleeping Beauty

My friend Kim found out she was pregnant one year ago today. I remember how I felt at that time, because Duane and I had also been trying to get pregnant. We didn't tell anyone, because it seems like once you tell people you are trying, they look at you completely differently. If you aren't instantly pregnant, they look at you like something must be wrong with you. Or they continuously ask you about it. We didn't want any of that -- our motto was that it would happen when it happened.

It took us about 4 months to get pregnant. I remember feeling disappointed every time my period showed up -- it makes you feel like less of a woman that you can't get pregnant instantly!

But looking at this little girl, watching her sleep so peacefully, I can't imagine having had any other egg meet with any other sperm. I watch her little personality start to develop, and my heart just fills with love. She already "talks" with her hands like her Daddy does. She has his smirk, and she is starting to smile at us when we talk to her. And she insists on putting her hands in her face when she falls asleep, as you can see here. I am really enjoying getting to know my daughter, even if it involves a lot of late-night "chat" sessions!

For the love of BOOB!

I always knew I wanted to breastfeed my children. It seems like the most natural thing to do -- God made me capable of nursing my daughter, so I should use the gifts he gave me, right? I mean, it is the easiest food for the baby to digest; it is healthiest for the baby; it is the healthiest way for me to get back in shape; and it is free! Plus I never have to worry about carrying around formula, and the time spent nursing forms a great bond between me and Rachel.

But no one ever really tells you how difficult breastfeeding can be. The pain is minimal really, but in the first few weeks thus far, I feel like I am in a constant cycle of feeding her. Every 2-3 hours, I feed Rachel for 30-45 minutes, leaving the time in between feedings for those daily tasks like cleaning, eating, showering, sleeping, using the bathroom... Then it is back to feeding her and waiting for her to fall asleep again.

Add to that the issue of Rachel refusing any form of pacifier other than mommy. So whenever she is fussy, even if she isn't hungry, I whip out my boob to comfort her. Rachel will occasionally take a bottle, but if she isn't hungry, I am the only one who can console her. I am the one who has to get up with Rachel during the night. Duane has tried to help whenever possible, but until I have enough expressed milk stored up and until I go back to work, it just makes more sense for me to get up with her so he can get his rest.

So it is becoming easier for me to understand why some people formula-feed their children and why some women give up on breastfeeding because of the challenges it presents.


But this morning, I woke up when Rachel stirred. I was already leaking all over my nightshirt (another fun aspect of breastfeeding), so I scooped her up and laid her in bed next to me. As I nursed her, and we laid face to face (or as close as you can get with someone who is less than 2 feet tall), she cooed in delight and drifted off to sleep. So I dozed next to her and enjoyed the intimate time with my daughter. When I nurse her, it gives me a chance to look at her, and my heart swells unconditionally. Occasionally she opens her big eyes and watches me as she eats, and she looks at me adoringly.


Breastfeeding is hard. I may not be able to nurse her as long as I would like. But every time I get frustrated, I think about that little angel watching me as she nurses. I think of that adoring look in her eyes and the fact that nursing her benefits us both in so many ways. And thinking about all this helps me get through one more day of nursing. With each day I get through, the next is a little more routine and a little easier...and I start to really cherish the time I spend nourishing my daughter with the gift God gave me.


A little bit of (short-lived) playtime for Rachel!

Almost 2 weeks!

Well, we have survived almost 2 weeks of parenthood! Rachel even slept for 5 straight hours the other night! Her sleep patterns are erratic. We tried replicating the routine from the 5-hour night, but she only slept a few hours straight the next night. I am not complaining though! At least she is sleeping at night more than she used to!
Since coming home, we have tried supplementing with formula, because it seems like she can't get a full belly to sleep on with just breastmilk. But the last few days, when we have offered her formula, she has turned away from it -- I think she prefers mommy's milk! She is so alert when she is awake. My new favorite thing is to lay her on the floor and watch her kick her legs about. She loves to stare at my face -- they say babies stare at the hairline, lips, and eyebrows at this point.

We have had our fair share of visitors this week! This crazy kid certainly is well-loved. Aunt Stephanie and the cousins, Aunt Jen and Uncle Phil, Aunt Julie and cousins Noah and Owen, both sets of grandparents, Aunt Patti, Aunt Kimmie...the list goes on and on!

Since I was really sore and still adjusting to being a mommy, my own mommy came to help me out this week. She cleaned the house for me and helped with meals. She escorted Rachel and me to the pediatrician a couple of times. (Rachel is doing very well, by the way!) Overall, she provided me with adult companionship during the day, which was desperately needed because I am not allowed to drive until next Wednesday. Ugh! I feel so cooped up! I was really sad when the end of the week rolled around, even though I am excited to spend time with Rachel one-on-one. I think I will just miss having someone to talk to during the day! But the soreness is getting much better, and once I can drive, I will make it a point to get out of the house and run small errands to keep my sanity.

On that note, we didn't do much to celebrate the Fourth of July. Rachel is too small to take to any fireworks right now. Duane could have gone to some fireworks in Ashville, but he felt bad about leaving me by myself with Rachel since I can't really go anywhere. However, Rachel did sport her holiday outfit that Aunt Stephanie gave her!

We have a few leads on sitters for when I return to work. Keep your fingers crossed that those pan out! I will try to keep posting new information and pictures throughout the summer!