So long 2011, bring on 2012!

A Leap Year to boot!

2011 wasn't so bad, actually. I love the number 11, so maybe that has something to do with it. The year was really nice. My pregnancy was healthy and normal. My not-so-baby girl turned 3 years old. I gave birth to my baby boy, who is healthy and growing like a weed. Duane's job brought new challenges and opportunities, along with some much-needed extra money to pay off some of those hospital bills! My job, well, it is still there. I was promoted in May, then went on leave from August through most of October, then got to work short weeks when I came back, and now I am on vacation until 2012!

So my goals for 2012 are as follows (in no particular order):

1. Lose the baby weight. We're talking ALL the baby weight, going back to my pregnancy with Rachel. When I got pregnant with Gavin, I had just started to lose a couple more pounds, but I was basically 10 pounds heavier than when I got pregnant with Rachel. That 10 pounds, no matter what I did, would NOT come off. I exercised every day for a month, and 5 days a week for 4 weeks prior to that, and I didn't lose ONE pound. I was pretty tone, but not skinny. With this pregnancy, I only gained 30 pounds, and I have lost about 26 pounds of that. Given that I am still nursing, I am okay with this, and the Weight Watchers has helped a lot. But I need to combine that with exercise. Which brings us to #2.

2. Run a 5K. Now initially, this was "Run a half-Marathon" but I thought that might be a bit lofty for a goal. I don't have much time to exercise as it is, so training for a 5K might be more realistic, then I can start training for a 10K, and then we can bump it up from there. This will get me into exercising for a purpose other than to just lose weight. It isn't going to be easy, but it looks like there are lots of training programs out there to help me get started. And now that I know my bestest Kim Cotter is doing the same, it might help!

3. Spend more time with the family. This may seem crazy, given the first two goals, but I need to spend more time with my family. Before Gavin got here, I didn't get to spend much alone time with Rachel because I was working all the time. Now, I know I need to make time for her and Gavin, and ESPECIALLY my husband. We barely see each other when the kids aren't around, and I am instituting some sort of date night every week. Time without the kids. It is not easy to keep the fires alive with two kids and four jobs, but we have to find a way to do that.

4. Pay off as much debt as possible. Enter the aforementioned four jobs. I freelance, Duane works at the bowling alley (which we are trying to buy), and we also both have full-time jobs. With all of this, we should be able to pay off as much of our revolving debt as possible this year. I don't need to be rich, but I do want to be able to spend $100 on something without flinching. Or go out and buy a much-needed new car for our expanding family. My old girl has 230,000 miles on her, and if she makes it one more winter without major issues, I will be thankful. We're not poor, but living in debt is like carrying extra weight on your shoulders. You always think about it.

5. Be a better mom. It's hard sometimes, having two kids, two jobs, a husband, bills to pay, finances to balance, workouts to get in, housework to do, blogs to write... Sometimes (too often) I lose my patience. I want to be a more patient and loving mom. Not sweat the small stuff. Have FUN with my kids. I want them to be kids, not tiny adults. I need to focus on what is and isn't important and have more patience and understanding.

6. Be less judgmental. I am adopting the saying, "Walk a mile in his/her shoes..." because this year has shown me that I am not a perfect parent. I am not a perfect wife. I am not a perfect employee. I have been the parent with the screaming toddler and crying baby in the store. I have yelled at my toddler in public. I have made mistakes at work. I have judged others, and acted like I was perfect. And I am not. No one is. So I am really striving not to judge people, most especially when I don't know what they are going through. It is all part of being a better Christian.

7. Figure out what I want to do when I grow up. As much as I love my job, and I am good at it, it isn't where I will retire from. This year has taught me that, if nothing else. I can move around and adapt as the company changes, but in the long-term, I am not going to retire from The McGraw-Hill Companies. And that is okay. I am only 31 years old. That seems old, because I have two kids and I have worked there for almost 8 years, but in reality, it is just a decade of the four decades I will likely work before I retire. That is one-quarter of my career. So it is time to start thinking about what I want to do now that I am getting older. And it may involve going back to school, which I shudder about, because I have little time as it stands. But I need to figure it out sooner rather than later.

Blog FAIL

I have been neglecting my blog again, so forgive me. I knew going back to work would be tough, but going back to work with two kids and a second job has been even tougher. I deluded myself into believing I would have time to go to the gym every evening, but some nights it is all I can do to get home and make something for Rachel to eat before slipping into a mental coma.

So work has been...interesting...the last few weeks. Just as I return from maternity leave and re-embrace my project that was supposed to be done before I ever got back, rumors begin to swirl about layoffs and re-orgs, etc. It soon became apparent that last Wednesday was D-Day (rather than Pearl Harbor Day -- my company can sure pick 'em). And when the e-mail went out from the first unlucky person called to HR, everyone in the company knew it was on, and we sat and prayed that our phones wouldn't ring. I survived the day, but we lost one of the people on our close-knit team, and that was tough.

So when I got home Wednesday night, I had to do a lot of reflecting. Work defines a lot of our lives, because most of us spend a good 40+ hours at work every week. I met some of my best friends at work. I am good at what I do. But if I were to lose my job, would I lose my identity? Would my life come to an end?

As if in answer to this question, Gavin slept a whopping TEN hours that night. I awoke refreshed, sad, but able to face the day after with more clarity than usual. And luckily I had my normal Friday vacation day to recover as well.

And I have been enjoying my kids a lot lately. As frustrating as it can be, I love being around them. We have been doing way too much to describe it all here. We have has Gavin baptized, met with Santa Claus, had sleepovers at grandparents' celebrated Thanksgiving, and started new routines. Gavin is on baby food now, and seems to enjoy that. Rachel has started a behavior chart to give her a bigger incentive to, well, behave. :) And I am just generally looking forward to spending the holidays with my family. Rachel finally seems to grasp the concept of Santa. She wants lots of purple presents for Christmas this year.

So I guess things are pretty good. Work is settling a little bit. Life at home is starting to become more routine. I am still hoping for a repeat of that 10-7 night of sleep, but we'll get there...